Moving

I'll admit it. I timed this blog terribly. I do plan to pick it up again (God knows I have a ton of material to sketch and gab about these days).

Unfortunately, it's going to probably be a couple of months (that could be optimistic) before I can get back into it. Why, do you ask? We're moving.


That's right. We're taking our Little Nutter Nuts, we're packin' up their stuff, and we're moving to another house.

Are we insane, or what?

Actually, we've packed up most of their toys already (in storage so that we could, you know, sell our house), so they're about to revolt.

I know this illustration is lame, but that's really all I had time to do. I only did this one because I had other stuff I had to scan anyway. Haha. Sorry.

But, soon! I'll be back soon! Don't forget about me!

Death by Stairs

My posts over the next month are going to be fairly limited as I tend to spend a lot of time making homemade Christmas gifts this time of year. Plus, I have a day job that isn't parenting that I do while I'm parenting. So, enjoy this one while you can! I plan to pick this thing up again when I finish up all my work and Christmas stuff!

My laundry room is down in my basement. The majority of my kids' toys are in the basement as well. So, every time I bring laundry downstairs, there's a significant risk of death or paralysis.


Also, note that my cat is darting under my feet at that exact moment, as well. He's cool like that. And, by cool, I mean heinous.

So . . . if nobody can find me, I could be lying on the basement floor amidst toys and laundry. Note that, please. Thanks.

Total. System. Reboot.

As much as I complain about the nuttiness of this household, nothing could've prepared me for the love overload that happens whenever I see this:


There is pretty much nothing in life that compares.

And, that's the face I make when it happens. Total. System. Reboot.

The Baby-Proofing is Not Enough

In case you're lacking in climbing, crazy, little boys in your household, let me just give you a little peek.



Yep. This stuff happens. A lot. In fact, if you have this going on, you actually get to a point where you say a little prayer of "thanks" to God when kids like this make it to their next birthday.

Bank Trip

I had to go into the bank one day because they had, like, two tellers in the whole place running both the drive-through and the counter. I originally started in the drive-through, but I had to leave (after I sent my money through the vortex-teleportation device, of course). I was going to be late to pick up Nora (I seriously sat there in my car by the vortex-teleportation device for 20 minutes after being greeted once).

Never would I attempt to go into a bank with what I've got going on these days, but I did this, very nearly, to prove a point. What was my point? You do not want me to come inside your bank, so you'd better tell me that my money is okay, like, pronto.

I'm hoping they learned their lesson. This was not a surprise scene for me, but that doesn't make it any less annoying.

That's the Way the Cookie Crumbles

Remember that science lesson in elementary/middle school where we learn about the difference between physical and chemical changes? It's really hard to teach that lesson to a quirky two-year-old.

When my kids finish their lunch or dinner, they are allowed to have a cookie. Most days, it's just an Oreo, but sometimes, they score it big and get a chocolate chip cookie (if my husband or I had the motivation to bake some).

My eldest son is typically very excited about getting a chocolate chip cookie. In fact, he'll sit there for about two whole minutes with a giant, surprised expression on his face, much like this:



Then, after much verbal motivation from me, he finally starts to eat the cookie. He very quickly discovers that the cookie is soft (how I like 'em), and the cookie falls apart. This usually involves him yelling, "OH, NO!" followed by something that looks like this:

Yep, those are some rage tears.

I try to explain to him over and over that the cookie is still a cookie and still very much delicious, but he refuses to believe it. Usually, it takes his sister asking, "Mommy, if he isn't going to eat his cookie, can I eat it?" before he wises up and eats the cookie pieces. Goofball.

Tap Tap Taparoo

Every weekday morning, it's always the same thing. I try, frantically, to get the kids something to eat. I try to make sure the baby is okay so that I can get something to eat (and try to get coffee into my system as fast as possible). Then, I might even try to clean up part of the house or throw in a load of laundry, if I think it's possible.

As you may well know by now, I find my dog to be largely annoying. He eats half of just about everything I bake. He eats napkins. He waits until we're not paying attention, and he gets into our bed and sheds everywhere and leaves "questionable prints" on our pillows and sheets (typically after I've just washed and changed the bedding).

There is one thing that he does every single day that makes me want to punt him. He tap dances around me until I go downstairs (in the basement) and feed him. It looks a lot like the following:



Imagine a ridiculous and constant tapping sound as his paws contact the floor.

These are his tap dancing moves. Up and down and up and down and tappy tappy tap tap tap. Tap tap taparoo!



This is me, every weekday morning, at my wit's end with the dog. I'm pretty sure I can be heard saying things like, "Knock it off, dog!" or, "Calm down, ding-dong!"

I'm not typically a morning person, but I'm not an un-morning person, if you know what I mean. The dog pretty much obliterates the easygoing nature from my soul every weekday morning when he's tap-tap-tapping around me while I'm trying to, like, feed my children and be a functional human being.

I recognize that he thinks he's absolutely going to die of starvation every morning, but I'd honestly rather he just stand there and bark at me over the tap dancing. He knocks stuff over. He runs into the kids. He sends my area rugs across the room because he tap dances across them. He pretty much delays getting fed because I'm too busy trying to undo his path of destruction as I'm trying to get to the task of feeding him.